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Living apart together: Once bitten, twice shy
Jon Dawson, 48, and Pauline Jackson, 59, were both left by spouses after long marriages and are wary of being hurt. Pauline, moreover, is studying for an Open University degree – on top of a full-time job as a cancer care co-ordinator
She says, “That has to come first, I don't know how people study with a family at home. I spent my married life waiting for someone to come home for dinner and I don't want to do it again.”
They live separately, one and a half miles apart, and see each other at weekends. Jon says, “We make the most of them, we've had romantic weekends in Paris and Stratford. We show our appreciation: if I'm going to Pauline's for supper I might take some strawberries.”
They usually spend at least one night a week together. “It could be at either house, depending on who has something decent in the fridge. Or we might bump into each other in the supermarket, doing our separate shopping, and one of us will say “I'll get another chop, come home with me,” says Jon, who explains that – although they call both houses home – he doesn't tend to keep his clothes at Pauline's.
“When I lived further away living out of a holdall used to depress me, but now I'm so close I stop off and change on the way to work.”
Their respective children are pleased if amused by the arrangement and accept them as a couple, as do all their friends and colleagues. “The only problem is what to call him; ‘partner' means business to me and I'm too old to have a boyfriend,” says Pauline, then adds, “To me the way we live is a bit selfish, but it gives us the best of both worlds.”
This article was created: 13 July 2006.
This article was last edited: 11 December 2006.
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