The grown-up test - Maureen Lipman
Maureen Lipman, real age 63, lives in west London. She was married for 31 years to playwright Jack Rosenthal, who died in 2004. They had two children, writers Amy and Adam. After TV roles in Minder and Skins this year, she is currently appearing in A Little Night Music at the Garrick Theatre, London
How much has Maureen Lipman learnt in her lifetime? And does she act her age?
Can you load an iPod?
No, I’m not very good with technology. I have a BlackBerry but I haven’t learnt how to use it.
What are the two main lessons life has taught you?
Patience and the ability to say “no” and not feel guilty about it.
Can you remember the lyrics of the first record you bought?
Mostly. It was I’m Sorry by Brenda Lee. I have a blank period of musical knowledge between the Sixties and the Nineties. I didn’t have pop-loving children. They liked show tunes. I stopped at James Taylor and started again at Amy Winehouse, though I don’t know any of her lyrics, either.
What’s the most you’d spend on a pair of shoes?
Probably around £250 if they were justifiably perfect, and I prefer my clothing and footwear to be logo-free.
Have you reverted to adolescent behaviour with old friends?
I do it all the time. Always at school reunions and on every job I do.
Have you used modern-day argot like “cool” or “dude”?
Yes. This is really, truly embarrassing. I was in the last series of Skins. In one episode, I had to flick my hand in a “street‘ manner and say, “do you get me blood, man?” I loathe the misuse of the English language. The phrase, “it’s well nice” drives me insane. The lack of adjectives used by this generation makes me furious.
What single thing would make getting older easier?
A bell on my glasses activated by my phone would make life much easier.
What two things do you do to conceal your age?
The two things that I’m certain do help are to mix with all ages and use Touche Eclat concealer make-up to disguise dark eye-bags.
When and where were you happiest?
Professionally, it was playing Joyce Grenfell in my stage play, Re: Joyce! Personally, I think happiness is a by-product of making something else and forgetting yourself, indulging in food and love and making other people laugh.
What makes you grumpy?
Quite a number of things. When I hear my voice, I’m surprised how Les Dawson-like I sound. I grumble with taxi drivers about the post, the roads, the state of the railways. I’m more jolly in the morning than the afternoon.
What was your childhood nickname and do you still have it?
My childhood nickname was Mo and yes, it’s still used by my friends.
What is your greatest regret?
That I wasn’t more patient with my mother. I’m getting chunky around the middle, as she did. She had a particular over-emphatic way of talking which was very funny. If I use that voice to tell a story, people fall about laughing.
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