Dilemma: my wife resents my better pension

Jo Brand / 12 April 2018

Agony aunt Jo Brand hears from a reader who doesn't want to pay for his wife's leisure activities out of his pension

Dilemma: my wife resents my better pension

My wife and I always earned roughly the same amount and paid for our own hobbies, days out and the like. It meant that we never had any money rows.

But we’ve just retired and I’ve got a much better pension. She seems a little resentful that I have more leisure money.

I can’t afford to pay for her all the time, so what should I do?

Jo Brand's advice

Well, Mister Very-Much-A-Bachelor-At-Heart, I would try to change my outlook double-quick if I were you. Marriage is generally regarded as a PARTNERSHIP.

And as such, within a partnership the participants tend to share things equally. This appears to have passed you by.

How’s the future for you two looking?

‘Oh well, cheerio then love, just off to catch my flight to the Maldives… Enjoy your long weekend in Clacton.’

What on earth are you thinking, and do you know how appalling you sound? You say your wife seems ‘a little resentful’. How very restrained of her. If I were your wife I would be extremely resentful, if not homicidal.

I suspect that your wife has probably spent years running around after you, cooking your meals and picking your pants up off the floor and still you can’t seem to appreciate your obligation to her.

My advice therefore is not to you, but to your wife.

Leave the mean old curmudgeon. Surely life with a little is better than waiting for the next crumb to fall from your lord’s table.

This advice may or may not be tongue in cheek.

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