The 'sandwich generation': 5 practical ways to ease the overwhelm

If you’re in your 50s, 60s or 70s and finding yourself pulled in multiple directions, supporting ageing parents whilst juggling children and grandchildren, it’s likely that you are part of the 'sandwich generation'.

There’s a whole generation of people quietly holding everything together.

It’s a lot.

Emotionally, mentally, and physically, the pressure can build until you’re running on fumes. Guilt is common, feeling like you’re not doing enough, not being enough, not coping 'well enough'. 

But here’s the truth: you are doing more than most, and it’s OK to feel stretched.

I've been a life coach for almost 20 years and I am seeing more people than ever before in this 'sandwich generation', all struggling to cope.

My clients often talk about the constant need to juggle, the feeling that they cannot drop any ball.

They feel exhausted but also feel needed and struggle to say no as they think they "ought" to be managing. Often the women are menopausal so coping with all the 'joy' that brings.

As I said, it’s a lot!

The signs you are in the 'sandwich generation'

So, what are some of the things that the 'sandwich generation' are juggling?

Caring for ageing parents

This can be our own OR our in-laws, we feel we "should" be available to help, there might not be an alternative option right now and these are some of the things we end up doing:

• Attending or arranging medical appointments and managing medications.
• Coordinating care needs, home support, or navigating social care systems.
• Supporting parents through emotional changes or cognitive decline (e.g. dementia).
• Taking on financial responsibilities or managing their money.
• Providing emotional support as they deal with ageing, loneliness, or loss.

Supporting our own children

If they are still at home, you will be:

• Handling everyday parenting: meals, school runs, homework, emotional needs.
• Supporting teenagers or young adults through exams, stress, and life transitions.
• Offering financial support.
• Balancing encouragement and boundaries to support independence.

If they have left home, it’s another whole host of challenges and these can include:

• Childcare for the grandchildren – you love them, you want to spend time with them, but you also have your own life.
• Financial help and support.
• Emotional support if they are going through their own challenges.
• Support for their partners and families and all that goes with that.

Managing work or business life

• Juggling professional commitments while emotionally and physically stretched.
• Facing limited workplace flexibility or burnout from running a business.
• Feeling guilt around underperformance at work or at home.

Holding the mental load

• Being the central organiser – birthdays, bills, appointments, shopping.
• Anticipating and managing everyone else’s needs.
• Feeling like the default decision-maker, planner, and emotional regulator.

Emotional and physical strain

• Guilt – not doing enough for parents, children, or work.
• Feeling constantly "on" with no time to rest or recharge.
• Experiencing fatigue, anxiety, sleep disruption, or low-level burnout.
• Losing a sense of self or time for personal hobbies and relationships.

You’re carrying a lot – but you’re not alone.

So many people in this stage of life feel isolated – like they should be coping better or have it all figured out. But the truth is, the load you’re carrying is significant. And you don’t have to keep pushing through without support.

And the good news is you don’t need a total life overhaul – small, intentional shifts can make a big difference.

5 practical ways to ease the overwhelm

Here are five practical tips to help you ease the overwhelm and reclaim a little breathing space:

1. Create micro-moments of rest

You may not be able to take a full day off, but you can build in moments that offer small pockets of calm.

Whether it’s a quiet cup of tea before anyone wakes up, a 10-minute walk after dinner, or five minutes with your eyes closed and phone off – these micro-moments restore more than you think.

2. Simplify your systems

Many people in the 'sandwich generation' are carrying mental loads that could be shared or streamlined. From medication schedules to school runs, look for what can be simplified or delegated.

3. Set and communicate boundaries

Boundaries don’t mean being selfish – they mean being clear. It’s OK to say no to a favour, push back on a request, or express that your time is limited. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

4. Make your own needs visible

Often, the needs of the person in the middle get lost. Your wellbeing matters too. It’s not indulgent to prioritise your health, your joy, or your space – it’s essential.

5. Connect with people who get it

You are not alone, even if it feels that way. Sharing your experience with someone who understands – even briefly – can ease the emotional weight.

Recognising the pressure is the first step toward finding some breathing space – and it’s not selfish to want or need that.

With small steps, you can move from barely coping to gently thriving, one practical shift at a time.