Vegetable failures of the year

Tiffany Daneff / 14 November 2014

Just because a plant withers and dies or succumbs to blight or keels over one sunny morning for no apparent reason doesn’t necessarily mean you’re no good at gardening.

Well, that’s what I tell myself, anyway.

Often as not it’s just a lack of time or care.

The classic example is going on holiday bang at the most tricksy moment as far as the vegetable garden is concerned. Without enough watering plants become vulnerable and even if you leave them to the neighbour, neighbours tend not to be as vigilant. As a result plants become weak and then its not long before disaster strikes.

Obviously, the sensible thing to do in such circumstances is to HIDE THE EVIDENCE.

But, in the interests of honesty, I am going to reveal this year’s most embarrassing failures:

The cucumber which the husband bought on the spur of the moment and I planted up a trellis.

What went wrong I planted it too close to the squash and nasturtiums.

Result It was quickly overtaken by the above, never got enough light and no fruits formed.

Verdict willful blindness

The aubergine another snap purchase by spouse

What went wrong I left the pot at ground level and over August forgot to ask the neighbour to make sure to water and feed it well.

Result Three split, dessicated husks of eggplant.

Verdict Near death by misadventure

The radishes sown from seed

What went wrong The first two pickings were a great success and then not only did I fail to sow more but I forgot to harvest them before the summer holidays

Result Twisted turnip sized monster radish that were useless to both man and beast

Verdict Criminal negligence

The self-loathing such failures engender is nothing compared to the embarrassment at being found out. But, there again, perhaps it offers a little comforting schadenfreude to others.

Tiffany Daneff is also the editor of the award-winning intoGardens app - the world's first magazine app for gardens. Visit the appstore to download a free sample or go to the website for more information. Gardening has never looked better or been more exciting. Visit for more info. 

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