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Dilemma: I want to travel but my husband doesn't

Jo Brand / 20 March 2017 ( 05 September 2019 )

A reader would like to see the world in her retirement, but her husband wants a quiet life in front of the TV.

Holiday plans
A reader is planning to travel in her retirement, but her husband has other ideas

Dilemma: How can I persuade my husband to travel?

I’m nearly 70 and feel at the peak of my life: I’d love to rent out our house and travel, but my husband just seems to want to watch sport on TV. 

He’s the same age, but seems to have given up on grabbing what the world has to offer. We have the money, the time, the opportunity. How can I persuade him?

Jo Brand's advice

How about emotional blackmail or threats? I really don’t think it’s going to work any other way.

I get the sense that you have always deferred to him and wanted to travel, but have ended up watching Match of the Day 2 every week or making the cricket club sarnies pretty disgruntledly (sorry, is that a word?). I know lots of couples who have different retirement ambitions and for all you know the planet is full of carefree wives who’ve escaped TalkSPORT and fugitive husbands rebelling against another night at bingo.

Call his bluff, tell him you’re going on your own and then stick to your guns. If he relents and agrees to come, great… if not, you’ll have to be prepared to go on your own.

Otherwise you’ll end up bitter and regretful aged 80, while he’s still happily stuck in front of the box. Whatever happens - make sure you have the adventure you desire!

Discover a selection of holidays designed specifically for solo travellers. Find out more here

Saga readers say...

'There are lots of solo holiday groups you can join and talk to before your first trip away, to build your confidence. Or maybe try a first trip that is within your comfort zone. Perhaps in the UK or somewhere you have been before. Maybe you have a friend or acquaintance who would love to get up and go. Travelling alone is a whole new experience and in my experience, you meet people wherever you go. You never know, once your husband sees what a great time you are having...

PS. Make sure you can handle your luggage easily. Take a book, can be used for all sorts of excuses, starting a conversation or for company in a restaurant. Be prepared to sit and watch the world go by.' Janette, via Facebook

'Seize the day and go alone leave him to his TV. There are many amazing opportunities out there for solo travellers, whatever your age.' Anne-Marie, via Facebook

'Perhaps start with a coach tour with like minded people. Coaching people are always friendly, then perhaps branch out with Saga,who will take care of you. I've had some lovely coach tours, and gone all over with Saga. Best of luck.' Ann, via Facebook



The opinions expressed are those of the author and are not held by Saga unless specifically stated. The material is for general information only and does not constitute investment, tax, legal, medical or other form of advice. You should not rely on this information to make (or refrain from making) any decisions. Always obtain independent, professional advice for your own particular situation.

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