Getting naked for somebody new

31 August 2015

When it’s time for a new relationship to turn physical, we can often succumb to fears and doubts. Here’s how to face that next step with confidence.



The growing sense of intimacy between yourself and someone new can light up your life and add an element of excitement you might not have anticipated at this stage of your life. But when it’s time for that undeniable spark to turn physical, we can often succumb to fears and doubts. Here’s how to face that next step with confidence.

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1. Treat your body to regular exercise

Perhaps you’re not as confident in your own skin as you were in your younger years, but this shouldn’t be the cause to shy away. Embrace the opportunity to get as fit as you can, perhaps even with your new partner? Regular exercise is known to boost sexual confidence and self-esteem, as well as help tone you up. What are you waiting for?

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2. Build up to the act

Making the move too soon can make you more nervous. A big part of feeling good naked with someone new is ensuring you are ready for the act of intimacy itself. Go on plenty of dates, romance one another, get to know each other properly on a mental and emotional level before getting physical. This way, your connection will be deeper and your lovemaking will be far more satisfactory.

3. Fake it till you make it

Confidence in the bedroom is a big turn on for both sexes. There’s nothing more attractive than someone who seems comfortable in their own skin, so when you're taking off your clothes for the first time with someone new, do it with confidence – even if you’re nervous. No one’s judging your curves, lumps or bumps. They are appreciating the wonderful you and the way you have learnt to love yourself.

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4. Set the scene

Sometimes, the fear of getting naked has a lot to do with the mood and atmosphere. Bright lights and loud music aren’t exactly the best way to boost our confidence if we haven’t disrobed for someone else in a while. If you know things are about to get physical, set the lighting just right; light candles or perhaps burn some incense. Aromatherapy can soothe, too. Once you’re happy with your surroundings, you'll be happier with yourself.

5. Stop fixating on your flaws

Nobody’s perfect. You’ve been around long enough now to wear your skin with pride, no matter what it looks like. Every little thing you have done has made you who you are. Pointing out your scars, or what you deem to be unsightly parts will only draw attention to them. If you don’t point them out, chances are your new partner won’t even notice. When in doubt, say nothing and let your new lover love you as you deserve to be loved.

For more information and advice about dating over the age of 50, check out our guide to the facts about dating in later life.

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The material is for general information only and does not constitute investment, tax, legal, medical or other form of advice. You should not rely on this information to make (or refrain from making) any decisions. Always obtain independent, professional advice for your own particular situation.