Five things you should never ask on a first date

25 November 2015

It’s important to be open and interested in what your date has to say, but there are some things that should just never be asked. Here are five of them.



Seeing if you have that all-important spark is the most exciting and important part of a first date. But while initiating conversation is as vital as being open and interesting yourself, there are some things that should probably never be asked. Here's some first date advice on what not to say.

Find out the common dating mistakes to avoid

1. “How much money do you make?”

Uh oh. No one likes a money-grabber, and unless you’re sure your date wants to be the next sugar daddy/mummy, asking about their earnings can make you seem more than a little shallow. Re-phrase the question so you sound more interested than offensive. Perhaps ask them about the career achievements they’re most proud of or why they chose to pursue that line of work?

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2. “So why didn’t your last relationship work?”

No, no, no. No one wants to divulge this information on the first date – they’re too busy trying to make a good impression and have a nice time with you. As soon as exes come into the conversation, one of you will always start comparing or even judging the other. First dates are new beginnings. Leave the past where it belongs – behind you.

3. “Where do you see this going?”

Hold your horses, eager beaver; it’s way too soon for that. First dates are all about establishing a comfortable connection. No one wants to feel like they’re being pushed halfway up the aisle when they haven’t even asked for the bill. Keep on being your wonderful, witty and approachable self and you never know, this question might soon be directed at you in a few months’ time.

4. “So, why are you single?”

There are few questions more frustrating than the condescending: “Why are you still single?” And when dating over 50, it has the potential to cause real discomfort if someone has been recently divorced or widowed. Even if you think you’re paying someone a compliment, it’s best to avoid this one.

5. “Does my [insert habit or feature here] annoy you?”

Any question in this family is a no-go. Why invite someone else to come up with a reason not to like you? We all get nervous on first dates but drawing attention to what you think are negative traits or features will just make you look like you lack confidence in yourself. Have faith that you’re great and more than worthy of your date’s affections and compliments.

Honorable mentions

Because if you’ve ever been on an awkward date, you know there’s more than five! First, try to avoid mentioning any political affiliations, especially if you don’t know about your date and his/her own. The same goes for religious beliefs. Politics and religion are subjects we can feel passionate about and thus, talking about them can make us sound overly opinionated. 

Stick to topics you can both discuss without things getting heated. You can always spice things up later... if you're lucky.

If you’re stuck for things to talk about on a first date, check out these great first date ice breakers

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The material is for general information only and does not constitute investment, tax, legal, medical or other form of advice. You should not rely on this information to make (or refrain from making) any decisions. Always obtain independent, professional advice for your own particular situation.